| just one more ass that got stuffed in some jeans |
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| F.O. post |
[25 May 2012|08:44pm] |
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Going mostly friends-only. I've locked all past posts, save for those that are linked from other places or contain icons/manips/toons/fic, etc. most of these are now locked as well. I apologize for any inconvenience.
Comment to be added.
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| As long as I live, I'll never forget this night. |
[06 Nov 2008|12:26am] |
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mood |
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 indescribable |
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After one of the longest and hardest days of my life, dozens of earsplitting screams of joy and relief, and countless tears, it's finally truly over.
I have been working tirelessly alongside some of the most amazing people these last two or three months. They have some of the biggest hearts, the toughest skin, and the strongest resolve of anyone I've ever known.
I have only three words to say on behalf of my new family...
Yes We Did.
... And there I go crying again.
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| AHAHAHAAA! |
[24 Oct 2008|02:11am] |
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Apparently I'm an America-Hating Hippie. xD
Skip to about 2:52.
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| Okay people, listen up. |
[27 Aug 2008|11:50pm] |
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I know I don't post often anymore, but I'm still the same old Rinney, so it shouldn't surprise you that Politics are still on my mind.
In fact, I'm more active than ever in politics. I'm a volunteer for the Obama campaign. I've hosted a house party with an Obama field organizer, I've been out there canvasing in the heat, and this weekend I'm being trained, along with my mother and Kevin, to become a neighborhood leader for the campaign.
I've wanted to become more active, politically, for years, but the thought of calling strangers on the phone, let alone walking up to their doors, was just too intimidating. Truth is, it's pretty painless. Actually, parts of it were really fun. Lets just say I met some real characters.
But at the end of the day I still don't feel like I've done enough. There's an urgency to this race that I have felt before. It was urgent last time. It felt absolutely necessary. I couldn't stand the prospect of four more years, four fucking years ago. I didn't do anything then. I just voted. Voting isn't enough this time. It's too important. We cannot afford to lose again. I know I said that last time, and I stand by it. We couldn't afford that loss. We couldn't afford another four years under this administration, and if you didn't believe that then, you can sure as hell see the proof of it now.
I can't sit by and wait. I have to do something. I wish you would too.
If you support Obama, that's fantastic! But listen.. if you feel the same urgency I do.. if you can't take the prospect of McBush winning in November, at least consider volunteering. Especially if you live in a swing state. I live in Missouri, in a suburb near Kansas City. If you've been watching the news, you know what that means. I'm lucky enough to live in an area that is crucial to this race, so how could I possibly pass over that kind of opportunity? I always feel so small and useless in the face of all the wrong I want to right, so how can I not take advantage of a chance to make a difference, even if my role is a small one? I'll take being a drop in the lake over a drop in the ocean any day.
If you want to get involved and don't know how, let me know where you live (county and city) and I can probably get you the phone number of your local field organizer.
If you're on the fence, please please please just.. get informed. And for fuck sake DO NOT WATCH FOX NEWS. Fox news is a fucking right wing sham parading as honest journalism. The real shame is that people eat it up. Do yourself a favor, do not let such biased and slanted media tell you what and how to think. Use your brain. Think critically about what you hear on the news, in the debates, and in speeches, or you'll be an easy target for propaganda. And then? Then you're just their chump.
Get your information from a reliable source. If you have questions about Obama's policies, from the general to the specific, let me know and I'll try to get the information for you straight from the Obama campaign's policy experts.
If you're leaning McCain.. can you please tell me why? I don't want to argue with you, I just want to know what about him or his policies you find appealing.
If you want a good argument for why you shouldn't vote for McCain, former President Clinton's address to the 2008 DNC earlier tonight is as good as I can give you. I know it's a Democrat speaking at the Democratic convention, but at least listen to what he has to say about the effects of the last eight years of abysmal leadership on our country, and ask yourself if you really want more of the same.
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| I hate to do this, but... |
[21 May 2008|02:16am] |
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Would any of you be interested in taking over ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif) hp_secrets?
I just don't have the time or motivation anymore, and I feel really guilty every time I get a comment asking when I'm going to update again, because I really don't have an answer.
I'd stay on as a member of the comm, but I doubt I'd be able to contribute much until ... maybe next year.
I'm not sure how I'd go about picking someone if more than one person is interested. Maybe it could be a group thing, though. Also, I'll be glad to contribute ideas now and then, if you want.
Any takers?
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| It only took me two bloody years to finish a poem. |
[13 Feb 2008|10:24pm] |
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Been reading a lot of poetry lately, which prompted me to re-read some of my own. This was the one I'd been proudest of. Not necessarily for the quality, but for the honesty behind it. Every time I read it, though, certain parts of it always made me cringe. They just weren't right and I really wanted to fix it, but I guess I didn't think I could, at the time.
Well, I finally sat down and gave it a good try. I'm happy with the results. It's far from perfect, but it doesn't make me cringe, so I think I can live with it.
Some of you might recognize it from the original I posted way back when.
Repellent
I am made of ugly things:
Mud and mold and vanity;
Rusted metal, boundless greed;
Shards of glass and hypocrisy.
Duplicitous and insincere,
I seldom am what I appear;
Masked not for sport, but out of fear,
Lest, granted sight, eyes see too clear.
Minutes turn, as night does day;
Drawn close, one moment. Pushed away.
You, too, will tire of my game,
Disarming, though, solicits pain.
Honey calls too many flies;
Some are harmless. Most tell lies.
Unsure of which don false disguise:
Vinegar repels them all, I find.
Aaaahhh, so much better. It's like scratching a persistent itch that's been out of reach for two years.
I've been reading a lot of Shakespeare. I think it shows in one or two lines. : / Oh well. Who better to imitate, right?
Speaking of! Please, please, please, rec me poetry/poets if you have any favorites.
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| Absolute madness. |
[05 Feb 2008|07:01am] |
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Election days make me CRAZY. This one more than most.
I've never, ever gone into the voting booth undecided before. I've always known exactly who and what I would vote for or against. This morning was a different story.
Let me just say that from the beginning I was a big fan of all three main Democratic nominees, and several of the underdogs as well. I've known all along that, while my pick may not get the nomination, there was no chance that I would be disappointed after all the votes were counted. This is the first time in a very long time I can remember being this excited about one candidate, let alone a handful. And it couldn't have come at a better time. We need good candidates now more than ever. We can't afford another 4 to 8 years of Republican "leadership." I can't stomach another fucking year. I can't even describe how demoralized and defeated I'll feel in November if my next president is a Republican.
The last two presidential elections have literally left me in tears. I can't take another disappointment like that. The older I get, the more important this becomes to me, and it was never unimportant to begin with.
So back to the drama of this morning, and why I made my decision at the very last second.
Even before announcements were made about who was running for the nomination, I was thrilled at the idea of Clinton or Obama running. I mean.. just the possibility of the first female or black president! If I'd thought about it, I suppose I would've said "yeah, that will probably happen in my lifetime," but it really snuck up on me and I couldn't be more excited. In fact, that alone would probably make it pretty unlikely that I'd vote for anyone else, because they were white men. (As a side note, Joe Biden would have been an incredible president.) I don't know what that says about me. Think whatever you want. Maybe it's stupid, but I can't say I really care. I want to see that sort of progress in my life. I need to. Especially after the last 8 years. I need to feel like my country has changed for the better as I've grown up. I need evidence of it. Because honestly, there just isn't enough. It's sort of crushing, really. Feeling like you've been fighting a losing battle all your life.
Here's the thing. I love Obama, I really do. During the last congressional election.. my god. Was he a rock star or what? He was a breath of fresh air that the party desperately needed. He was so new and so exciting. That was the first little trickle of excitement, for me. the first hint at good things to come, after such a depressing, seemingly endless drought.
And then there's Hilary Clinton. I've heard every argument against her. I know there are people who feel like a vote for Hilary is just a vote for "Clinton." That Hilary, as president, is just Clinton revisited. That whether you like/liked Bill Clinton or not, voting for Hilary isn't voting for change. I understand this point of view, I just don't necessarily agree. Although, that admittedly could have something to do with my being what you might call your typical Clinton fangirl. Bill Clinton is the only decent president of my lifetime thus far. I remember being in grade school and thinking how unfair it was that I couldn't vote. It still makes me mad that I never got a chance to vote for Bill Clinton. That I wasn't able to be a part of that. Because, think about it. I'm 22, almost 23, and there have only been two elections in the last 23 years with favorable results, as far as I'm concerned. Add to that the devastating results of the last two elections, and you start to feel like you missed out on something really important. As silly as it may seem, at only 22 these last 8 years have made me feel as if I missed out on my only chance to elect a president I really believed in. That's how depressing it's been.
I know that Hilary isn't Bill. I won't deny that, given the chance, I would elect Bill again. Gladly. Enthusiastically. Ecstatically. But Hilary is not Bill. I absolutely do not consider that a negative thing. I'm just making it clear that I knew my options, and knew them well. Maybe in the very beginning, when people were just starting to whisper about the possibility of Hilary running (way back before/during the last presidential election, actually), my idea of Hilary as a politician was admittedly quite interwoven with my idea of Bill as a politician, but then.. I imagine it was for most people, at the time. It no longer is, for me. Bill is Bill and Hilary is Hilary. It's nothing at all to do with her developing a more separate identity, and everything to do with me getting to know her as the entirely stand-alone person and candidate she always was.
I really like Hilary. She may not give me that little thrill of excitement over newness that Obama does, but my understanding, respect, and trust in her runs deeper. Putting aside small details and differences in plans and intentions of each candidate (though make no mistake - I've paid very close attention to both and have found my "compatibility" with both Clinton and Obama to be just about dead even, wherever the ups and downs happened to fall on either side), I find myself simply more comfortable with the prospect of Hilary in office. Not at all uncomfortable with Obama, mind you, just more comfortable with Hilary.
There was a time, around when the actual campaigns began to really gear up, when Hilary was getting on my nerves. The game of politics always rubs me the wrong way, and it really bothered me to see her playing the game, as necessary as it may have been. I hate the polished machine, the automated-response, the plastic smiles and practiced movements that go along with anything that relies on public opinion. And nothing relies on the public like politics does. It irritates me that such care is so absolutely necessary. I know the blame lies with the public, not with the public figure, but it never fails to disappoint me anyway.
I won't even get into dirty politics. I abhor dirty politics. (But then, when are politics ever clean?)
In any case, the annoyance was short-lived. She loosened up. Lightened up. She learned how to be herself without being so human that it put people off. How sad is that? That being human is a handicap to a candidate? We can claim to prefer they be personable all we want. The numbers don't lie. Be personable, sure. But for Christ sake, don't be real. Don't be human. Don't be like us. I'm so sick of it. I truly hope this changes a little more with each generation. I hope, one day, honesty to the point of candidness actually makes a candidate more electable.
Anyway, I'm getting off topic.
I've said for ages now that I wanted to vote for Hilary. I've also said, though, that my vote would go to whoever I believed could win. Forget about who I like most. The absolute most important thing, without a doubt, is who could win in the final election. Because anyone, any one of them, is preferable to another 4 to 8 years of republican administration. So I decided long ago that I would vote for whoever had the best chance.
For a long time, I thought it was Hilary. The last few months, this changed. I began to realize that while both Hilary and Barack are strong candidates, and both will inspire a large Democratic turnout for the election, one of them will also unfortunately inspire larger numbers of Republican turnout.
The religious right are certainly not fans of either candidate, but they hate Hilary. They absolutely hate her, and I've no doubt that if Hilary is the Democratic candidate in the presidential election, they will be motivated to turn out, and to make sure other republicans do as well.
This is why I had decided to vote for Obama. Don't get me wrong - if I didn't like Obama, I wouldn't have made that choice. But as I've said, I love him. He would make a great president.
So, I thought I'd made my decision. This last week, though.. I just couldn't get it out of my mind. I just.. felt bad. Like I was letting myself down by going with the smart choice over the one that felt right for me. Still, I was sure I'd vote for Obama.
Then this morning I was watching election coverage. That's my day, morning to night, on election days. And, inevitably there's last-minute interviews and attempts by candidates to get their message out. There was an interview with Hilary in which she was questioned about her so-called "emotional display" at an event last night. A few tears escaped her eyes as she listened to a touching speech by an old friend who she used to do social work with.
I was enraged. It's sexist! It's so fucking ridiculous, this quiet (but not so quiet) insinuation that a woman can't do the job because of her emotions. It reminds me of that episode of Sex and the City where the women are talking about how if you cry once on the job, you're forever treated like an emotional volcano. "Oooh, don't upset her, she might cry again!"
Women are just as capable as men in every way. Fuck anyone who says different. I don't even really consider myself much of a feminist, and I'm fucking pissed about this. It goes back to the human thing. Don't be human, and for fucks sake, DON'T be emotional. Emotion is for sissies, right? Emotion has no place in politics.
I say bullshit. Need proof? Human emotion hasn't played enough of a role, if any at all, in the decisions of the administration of the last eight years. We need emotion. We need caring. We need empathy! Who the hell are we without it?
We're Bush, that's who. We're Cheney. We're Limbaugh and O'Reily. We're selfish, short-sighted, and cold-hearted. Heh. ... We're republicans.
Still, I sat down at that booth, the paper before me, not knowing what circle I'd fill. I hesitated. Mom voted beside me, and left. And at the final fucking second, I sat there and battled with myself. And in the end, on a momentary whim, I voted with my gut instead of my head. I voted for Hilary.
And now I'll sit back and wait. And to be absolutely honest, I will be happy with the results, whatever the results are. Because neither option is a bad one. If the decision were mine alone? I can't even say for sure that I would still choose Hilary. That's what allowed me to vote for her, actually. Knowing it wasn't all up to me. Far from it, of course.
I think I did the right thing. I made the choice that allowed me to leave without a sense of guilt. Worry, sure. But no guilt. No guilt from allowing the threat of the religious right to decide my vote. It wasn't any sort of dislike for Obama that wouldn't allow me to vote for him, it was a personal conviction, a determination not to let them force a change in my vote. To do so felt like letting them win. (Just to be clear - by no means is an Obama nomination a win for the religious right. You understand my meaning though, yes? I hope I've been somewhat clear, at least. I'm not the most eloquent speaker or writer, as you can see.)
I can say this. Whatever happens today.. whoever runs in November.. as long as the Democratic candidate wins, I can't even begin to describe how ecstatic I'll be. If it's Hilary.. it's Hilary! And a woman! The first female American president. And if it's Barack, my god! Can you even imagine? A black president! Only twenty-three years old and I'll get to see that happen! (Though we all know it's far overdue. I just mean it was unexpected this soon.) There's no denying the clear, loud message it sends, simply electing a black man into the most powerful position in the world. There's no denying the progress. There's no denying what I've had a difficult time believing over the last eight years - that America really has changed for the better. That our eyes are open. That equality is not only possible, but within our reach. It will be a monumental, unforgettable day. I'm tearing up, just thinking about it. (If I hadn't forced myself to put pen to paper on a whim, I probably could have sat there all fucking day. I still wonder if I made the right choice. But how great is it to be torn between two wonderful options? This primary has sort of been an embarrassment of riches for Democrats, the way I see it.)
Whichever one it is, if the Democratic candidate wins, it means something more. It means the republican reign will be over, and we can breathe again. I can feel safe again. I can feel like we're moving forward. Like we're taken care of. Like the "little people," the underprivileged, the minorities, the disadvantaged are being looked after again. Are being helped again. Are being heard again. And nothing matters so much as that.
You guys! This is the beginning! God, I'm so excited. I'm terrified, but mostly excited. I'm going to focus on the positive. I'm not going to let myself think about the possibility of a republican win. It's just too important. Too incredible and wonderful on one side, and far too terrible and devastating on the other. My nerves will be shot by the end of the year if I let myself ride that particular emotional roller-coaster.
This is incredible, guys. Something huge is coming. Can you feel it? This is history in the making.
Ahahaa. I'm such a nerd. xD
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| The Kiilllerrrrsssss |
[12 May 2007|02:57pm] |
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music |
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Move Away - The Killers |
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Saw Hot Hot Heat and The Killers at city market last night. Really, really good show. My feet are still sore.
We didn't get to the venue till about 15 minutes before HHH came on. We didn't really want to bother with standing in line and being smushed in with everyone at the front. Besides, the music sounds just as good from the back, right? So yeah, during HHH's set we were sort of toward the middle of the crowd and we just chilled and enjoyed the music. Between that and The Killers coming on people started pushing and closing in, so we got carried along with them and ended up.. I dunno. Closer. And smushed. But oh well.
Okay so.. women with large breasts know that they can come in handy for sneaking things into concerts and such. I always put my camera in my bra. Only this time.. I knew I'd be taking lots of video and my camera EATS BATTERIES so I put a couple extra batteries in there too, lol. Once we got inside I was looking for somewhere to hide while I dug everything out. The camera was easy, of course, but the batteries proved tricky. See.. my bra is sort of like the abyss. Sure, you can put something in there, but don't count on getting it back, you know? I ended up with my camera and one spare battery, assuming that the other had fallen out somewhere. I found it about halfway through the show. xD And just in time before my camera died. Yay boobs!
K, these are kinda shaky and I basically suck at this. I knew I should stop dancing/jumping while recording, but sometimes the song just demands it. Also the sound is muffled occasionally when I accidentally put my thumb over the mic.
I had to cut it into three because it was almost 300 mb and the limit is 100.
Middle of Nowhere, Goodnight Goodnight, Sam's Town, Bones, Smile Like You Mean It, This River is Wild, and Brandon breaks up a fight.
( + two more )
Fucking great show. How does anyone not love this band? Seriously.
The only disappointment was that they didn't play Indie Rock n' Roll.
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[10 Apr 2007|07:35pm] |
I seriously just started crying because of an aspca commercial, lol. I want to adopt one of those poor kitties and spoil them rotten.
Speaking of spoiled kitties.
( Figaro is such a lush. )
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| Wow. You HAVE to watch this. |
[30 Mar 2007|05:47am] |
So youtube is actually good for something. Who knew?
This girl is basically a goddess. I love her.
I wish I were this brave.
Fat Rant:
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[17 Jun 2006|09:41pm] |
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They were clearly separated at birth.
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[30 Jul 2004|04:14am] |
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I've added all icon and manip posts to my memories and categorized them so people won't have to skim through to find them.
And I realized that I've never posted this, sooo..
Here's a R/Hr manip I made ages ago. It's pretty big, like the other one I posted.
( How cute are they!? )
(comment&credit to use)
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